| wtf...is wrong with our world? |
[Nov. 18th, 2005|11:28 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  blah...what else can i be? | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | dashboard...im getting EMO on you. | ] |
You're probably starting to notice that the only time I ever write now a days is when there is something wrong with me. Well, I can't seem to really think straight lately. I mean, ever since Mike died, strange things have been happening. Starting with other people that I know being baker-acted or getting caught cutting their wrists and stuff. I would never go down a road like that again. It's to scary and SO not worth it. You know something, I have never been so confused about anything. i feel like I am in a twilight zone that I am forever going to be stuck in. Like I am in the dark. I have never been so scared or confused in my life. I think about Mike all the time and I keep getting flashes of him jumping. It's so easy to visualize yet I wasnt even there. It feels like I was though, like i was standing right next to him...falling with him, and then it's like I wake up. I have been having dreams like that and I have also been dreaming that I am being chased by these two guys who want to kill me. Rape me, beat me...I dont know...they just want me for some reason. NOT a good one either. I am studying in Psychology about sleep and dreams and stuff...and I just read something of how dreams mean something with your everyday life...and if you get hurt in your dream and you wake up, that part of your body will actually hurt too. That happens to me too. It's so strange...Just how everything has been playing out lately. I can't say I'm one of the ones who is going to up and leave everyone else behind, but everything seems to be funny. My mom is about to have a baby, not a bad thing but im kinda scared for some reason. My boyfriend has been grounded and acting strange alot lately. Ive been getting really frustrated with him lately...idky, but i have. Ive been wanted to just scream. I think it is everything around me..not him, but i just want to scream to him but i feel that i cant. because the time i actually get with him i dont want it to suck for him so i keep quiet. All I want to do is cry. I have been so emotional lately. And I cant really put my finger on why i am so irritable. Its so strange...I feel like, I'm lost....
I feel like, I'm in the dark............. |
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| RIP |
[Oct. 30th, 2005|02:19 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  ......... | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Hear you me | ] |
Have you ever felt like...everything is going ok? And then a HUGE curveball is thrown at you...and you dont have any idea what to think...I just wish that I knew what to think....what to feel...what to say...how to say it...
I am a zombie-----
Me. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 15th, 2005|07:59 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  mix-emotioned | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Relient K--Be My Escape | ] |
There was once this time that I was so blind to the truth. I was being beaten down by this pain that I believed was so great. I didn’t understand that I was being trampled and bruised. Then one day there was this lift, this opened eyed shock that everyone had been telling me about, finally stepped out. Everything had finally all came into view. I broke through that enormous wall that pain had been forcing down upon me. I ran over that bridge that was swaying and broken. I burnt it down, never to return to that side of hurt. I could never be apart of that excruciating hurt again. Never like that. Dear God: I think I’ve broken my heart again...can you fix it? What he answered with was so amazing. Not in words did he say, but he gave me a gift so great, something no one could ever ask for in relation. This gift was beautiful, full of light. It came so sudden, so quick. My eyes were blind at first; not believing it was for me. Thinking, no, it can’t be for me, I can’t…but I could you see, I could. It was mine and no one could ever take it away from me. Never would I let them. It was love.
Ya so I haven't random free-style in a long time so, I figured why not give it a shot. It came out like wild-fire. I guess it's something I really feel deep about. Someone must have inspired it. Humm...I wonder who that was?!?!
So, I cleaned my room and re-arranged it. It looks kool! I love it. oOo well...that was a 2day event. Now i can just go die in a nice clean room...on a nice clean bed. I am so pysched!
Tomorrow is Sunday. Yuck. My sister is a bitch...wow that was random. But, she is sometimes...she hurt Grady...only the greatest guy ever. WOW! |
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| letting go? |
[Aug. 3rd, 2005|07:56 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | sigh. | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Fall to pieces | ] |
So today was the first day of school and it was quite fun. My schedule was messed up but i dont care because that means I have like NO work until its right LOL. ROTC is great. I have a good company and that makes me proud. But I hung out with Kyle, Sarah, Amber, Cassie, and Jessica after school and it being the first day of school...really reminded me of how much I miss Kyle, Sarah and Amber...and then this year Jessica and Cassie are going to be graduating, and then Lloyd my Love will be too. And that makes me wanna cry. They have all become such great friends to me...and I am going to miss them alot. I know I still have Kyle, Sarah and Amber around...and Im sure that I will still have Jess, Cassie and Lloyd when they graduate...but not being able to see them everyday is gonna kill me. It sucks being the youngest of the group. At least I'll still have my great underclassmen like Swain, Melissa, David Jones..and Everyone else...but still. Sigh* I will miss the people I have become such great friends with. Especially Lloyd and Cassie man. One more year with those guys. Jeez! this is gonna kill me. I love them so much. It's like another Kyle and Sarah episode. I hope that I am Battalion Commander next year so that my Senior year will be a breeze. Well, I pretty much know ill be on staff, but to have BNCO...I will be going out with a >BANG< and that will make me happy. One more year and I'm on my own. And then after that...off to college i guess. It's so hard for me to let go of people and I guess thats what this entry is really all about. I have to keep holding on and then letting go of James because he's in the Army and thats hard enough. But then every like 8months, I loose the greatest friend I have too. It really stinks. I love them so much. And like I said I know I will always have them as my fiends..but they are what keep me smiling everyday. And to be without them...will be lame.
I love you guys so much and if any of you are reading this...I love you even more. Lol...for as crazy as I am sometimes I really do have my moments of being sad...for as happy as I am sometimes too...I hide what i really feel part time because I dont want you guys to know that I'm sad. I love you all so much. And I miss you.
Love Me. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 2nd, 2005|01:51 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  wow | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Collide. I love sarah! | ] |
i seem to have this huge fear of departcher. i believe thats how its spelt...but i do. i hate it...but i guess i am seriously going to have to get used to it. I love him to death...and it sucks that i get to see him then dont, and get to see him and then dont! ERG!!!
The Army makes me mad! Lol...but i will get used to it! I HAVE TO
School starts tomorrow and i am so excited. New classes, new people, new friends, new teacher......ok....let me start over. New classes, new people, new friends...thats about all. Lol
But really...i am gonna miss all my grad. friends form last year...oOo well. One more year and I'm on my own. ;( I'll miss you soon to grad friends too!
Sigh. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 27th, 2005|02:06 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  i love him | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Fall to pieces! | ] |
So i finally get to see the love of my life this weekend! I am so excited! after going almost 3months without him...its so awesome to know i have like 2days til i get to see him! I AM SO PSYCHED!
i love you baby! Nothing will ever change that!
October 27, 2003... 0700! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 8th, 2005|04:46 am] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  I CANT SLEEP! | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Tick Tock Tick Tock | ] |
ok so...im with manda about posting a very random entry. this weekend i am getting a hotel on the beach for MY 16th birfday! UNLESS OF COURSE::: the gay ass hurricane fucks it up for me...then ill just be plain mad! but of course i have a backup plan for it to be at my house...which would probably be beyond lame! but life goes on! lol so..dates to remember for me!
:::July 9- BEACH WEEKEND PARTY!!! all must attend!
:::July 16 through 23- Leave for the great outdoors for a week for JROTC camp, and coming back with the wonderful Hick, Soldier 5in up the wrist sunburn! great fun!
:::July 22- The Great Amanda BenHoe's 16th birthday! I love her and she loves me so...me not being able to call her on her birfday thanks to camp...shouldnt be a grudge she holds against me...right Manda??? lol
:::JULY 23- MY 16th BIRTHDAY! just like manda said...call me and if i dont answer PLEASE leave me a great message...itll make my camp homecoming a whole lot nicer...being that i AM at camp on my birthday...but i will be able to call you back to thank you that day...jsut not til like 5ish! # you ask:5436661! PLEASE! <3
:::July 27- Daddy's Birfday! HES GETTING OLD hahaha
:::July 29 through 31- GEORGIA to see my Loverly baby, James Rozar at basic training for the Army...ITS BEEN FOREVER SINCE IVE SEEN HIM!!! OMG! this sucks...I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!
:::August 3- BACK TO SCHOOL!!!! and im excited?
:::August 5- SO WARPED TOUR! werd
:::August 6- Amanda BenHoes party! that so owns! i am excited...two hotel parties within ONE month??????????? hehehehehehe.....we own!
:::August 26- LICENSE!!!
:::September 1 and 2- another trip to Georgia! So, i can see my baby GRADUATE from AIT! yayaya...
and i believe that is all that is important at the moment! :)
So...call me on my birfday? July 23rd! DONT FORGET! 5436661 |
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| DEEBO! manda lol |
[Jul. 6th, 2005|10:00 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  hahahahaha fumin man! | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Bedroom Talk | ] |
[ Current Mood ] BORED...there is nothing to do
[ Current Music ] umm...what else? Bedroom Talk: The Starting Line
[ Current Taste ] Chinese? lol yaya
[ Current Make-up ] haha good one
[ Current Hair ] up and everywhere
[ Current Annoyance ] OMG MANDA SAME HERE...bug bites!
[ Current Smell ] um..wood stain lol
[ Current Favorite Group ] The Starting Line or Hawthorne Heights
[ Current Book you're reading ] none
[ Current Color Of Toenails ] Blue
[ Current Refreshment ] Iced Tea
[ Current Worry ] My boyfriend is sick still
LAST PERSON...
[ You Touched ] um...my dad...NOT LIKE THAT
[ You Talked to ] my dad again?
[ You Hugged ] Shelley?
[ You Instant messaged ] Seisha i believe
[ You Yelled At ] brother bwhahaha
WHO DO YOU WANT TO...
[ Kill ] N/A
[ Slap ] my brother
[ Look Like] ya...Dido to looking like ME
-W H O-
[makes u laugh the most?] James and i believe thats all
[makes you smile] James, Manda
[is easiest to talk to] James...when i can :(
-D O. Y O U .E V E R-
[sit on the internet all night waiting for someone special to I.M. you?] i have....
[save aol/aim conversations] i dont believe i have
-D O .Y O U / / A R E .Y O U-
[smoke cigarettes] no.
[obsessive] no clue?
[could u live without the computer?] probably...it is a major form of communication
[color ur hair] i do
[habla espanol] un pocinto
[how many peeps are on ur buddylist?] 189 lol
[drink alchohol?] on occations
[like watching sunrises or sunset] yes both.
-N U M B E R-
[of times I have had my heart broken? ] once
[of hearts have broken? ] a good few
[of guys I have kissed?] no idea
[of scars on my body?] i good 35ish
[of things in my past that I regret?] a few...
_______Your Life_______
[x] they call me: Mego
[x] sex: female
[x] my first breath of air: I DONT KNOW!
[x] status: Long Term Relationship...so proud...I'M YOUNG and in LOVE...deal
[x] best friends: James, MandaBenHoe, Lloyd, and newly Seisha...
_______Rewind_______
[x] most memorable memory: dancing in my room with my loverly love of my life
[x] worst?: childhood that i DONT remember
[x] first word uttered?: Dog...haha
[x] first best friend ever!?: Cayla Bayla! Tampa!!!!!!! :(
_______Love?_______
[x] love is:
Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood. So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love....wow...that was powerful!
[x] first love: true love?
[x] love or lust?: love
[x] is it possible to be in love w/ more than one person at the same time: no
[x] when love hurts, you: leave it alone...yes...manda you are a God.
[x] true or false: all you need is love: could go both ways
[x] is there such thing as love @ first sight?: i dont believe in love at first sight for One reason...love will always deserve a deeper look.
[x] are you in love right now?: yes...i am.
[x] how many times have you been in love?: just this once.
_______Opposite Sex_______
[x] turn ons: Hands (wierd?) and just understance
[x] do your parent's opinion on your bf/gf matter to you?: if you know me...i think you will know that answer! lol
[x] what kinda hair style?: doesnt really matter
[x] the sweetest thing a member of the opposite sex can do for you?: well...probably believe in me for anything. there is something that means so much to me and thats not to ever doubt me...i get enough of that and no matter what i do...half the time its not enough...just believe
[x] are you the type of person to HOLLER and ask for numbers?: um..well no.
_______Picky Picky_______
[x] dog or cat: dog.
[x] short or long hair: doesnt matter
[x] sunshine or rain: rain
[x] moon or sun: moon
[x] 1 best friend or 10 acquaintances: ONE best friend is plenty
[x] summer or winter: winter
[x] written letters or e-mails: letters
[x] play station or nintendo: nintendo! OH YES!!! I LOVE IT
[x] car or motorcycle: car
[x] house party or club: Beach party.. lol<<<haha good one manda im with you.
[x] sing or dance: sing.
_______Lately_______
[x] how are you today? feeling like ass...need another shower! lol
[x] what pants are you wearing right now? just jean cut offs.
[x] what shirt are you wearing right now? ANNIE shirt lol
[x] what does your hair look like at the moment? wow...a whole lotta bad
[x] what song are u listening to right now? Bedroom talk
[x] how is the weather right now? descent
[x] last person you talked to on the phone? chinese food lady...dont ask what she said...IM CLUELESS
[x] last dream you can remember? first day of school, in front of my great ROTC company...and then my boyfriend walks in and surprises me...i woke up crying...ya...
[x] who are you talking to right now? whoever is reading this...
[x] what time is it? 10:20 PM
_______More About YOU!_______
[x] what are the last four digits of your phone number? cell? 6661 scared?
[x] if u were a crayon, what color would you be? red
[x] have you ever almost died? yes.
[x] have u ever won any special award? spelling bee, soccer a few times, and a BUNCH of ROTC crap!
[x] what's the stupidest thing u have ever done? broke down
[x] how many kids do you want to have? 2-3
[x] son's name? Noah Reade...just a guess?
[x] daughter's name? not sure
[x] shampoo? Herbal Essence!!!
[x] what are you most scared of? ROACHES!
[x] how many TV's do you have in your house? 5
[x] do you have your own TV? yaya
[x] have you ever broken/sprained/fractured a bone? 4 all at once
[x] who do you dream about? him.
[x] who do you tell your dreams to? not really anyone...
[x] how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? oh oh...lil kim! hahaha i dont know damnit
_______You And Love_______
[x] do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend? YES!!!!!! :)
[x] where would you like to go on your honeymoon? somewhere away from here would be just wonderful
[x] what do you like most of the opposite sex? believing and determination
[x] do you find yourself attractive? on some days
[x] do others find you attractive? not sure...thats there opinion
. : You : .
Name: Meagan Nicole Wilfert
Nick-Name: Mego, MegHoe
Sex: female
Birthdate: July 23, 1989
Birthplace: Dunedin Florida...BORING but raised in Slippery Rock Pennsylvania! yayayaya
Current Location: P-Park.
Height: 5'6"
Hair Color: umm brown?
Eye Color: green
Righty or Lefty: righty
Sign: LEO
Status: Married....i mean Long term relationship lol
. : Favorites : .
Color: red
Place: slippery rock..that i remember
Number: 23
Smell: LILU! im so with tina and manda
CD: HAWTHORNE HEIGHTS
TV Show: Date my mom..
Radio Station: 94.9 delilah! lol
. : Opposite Sex :
Turn Ons: urg...
Turn Offs: ass holes.
Height: taller then me
Hair Color/Length: dont care! FUCK!
Eye Color: blue . : One or the Other : .
McDonalds or Burger King: NEITHER
Short or Long Hair: Grrr
Nike or Adidas: Adidas
Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi...if any
Chocolate or Vanilla: neither
Single or Group Dates: both.
. : More About You : .
Your Heritage: German and Italian
Your Weakness: people unbelieving
Your Fears: ROACHES!
Your Most Overused Phrase on Messenger: lol
Your Bedtime: whenever
Smoke: hello?
Cuss: IM GERMAN!
Take a Shower Everyday: smelling pretty is my best asset
Have a Crush: manda benhoe
Believe in Yourself: HELLO! what the hell?
Get Motion Sickness: nope
Think You're Attractive: ehhh
Get Along With Your Parent(s): sometimes on most subjects
Sing: EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE
Play an Instrument: vocals, keyboard
Been on Stage: tons and tons
Been Dumped: not like it mattered
Gone Skinnydipping: i wish
Dyed Your Hair: yaya
Been Called a Tease: bwhahaha
Been Beaten Up: no
Describe Your Dream Wedding: anything good
How do You Want to Die: sleeping
Where do You Want to go to College: somewhere with ROTC...in Feorgia would be nice
What do You Want to be When You Grow Up: a few things...soldier
What Country Would You Most Like to Visit: Germany
What Are You Going to do There: idk! be a soldier? lol
Do You Believe in Love at First Sight: i answered that WAY up there ^^
Been in Love?: i am
Been Kissed?: yaya
Gotten a Hickie?: hahaha
. : Best : .
Song: ????
TV Show: dont erally watch TV alot!
Movie: Notebook, A walk to remember, The pants movie.. lol good ones!
Quote: "Be strong. Believe"
Eye Color: green/Blue
Hair Color: brown.
Articles of Clothing: sock! lol
. : Number : .
Of People I can Trust With my Life: one
Of CD's that I Own: ???
Of Movies that I Own: ????
Of Piercings: 5
Of Tattoo's: one
Of Scars on my Body: like 35
Of Things I Regret: a few
Of Concerts You've Been To: ALOT
Of classes You've Failed: NEVER
Of ex boyfriends/girlfriends: a good lot..but i only ever really loved the one i have |
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| wow...like...whoa |
[Jul. 3rd, 2005|07:32 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  OMFG! like 3weeks...how awazin | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Bedroom talk...THE STARTING LINE | ] |
I talked to the love of my life today, got into a slight arquement...but no hard feelings...everything still going well. I love him so much!
I have 26days 13hours and 27minutes until i get to see the best thing thats ever happened to me! I love him so FUCKING much...and no i am not lieing...
:):):):):)...:( i miss you. |
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| I'm falling in love too MANDA! |
[Jun. 22nd, 2005|05:06 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | indescribable | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Different | ] |
I WANT: to break my curiosity
I HAVE: the bestest friend anyone could ever have
I WISH: I could be with him right now. DIDO
I HATE: that i am so far away from him
I MISS: him..and my bestfriend
I FEAR: losing him..............
I HEAR: different
I SEARCH: for the truth
I WONDER: when i get a chance
I REGRET: taking so long..
I LOVE: you...<3
I ACHE: when i think of the lose
I ALWAYS: figure things out
I AM NOT: understood
I DANCE: in front of my mirror
I SING: like nobodys listening...its my remedy
I CRY: cause im scared
I AM NOT ALWAYS: innocent
I WRITE: everynight and day
I WIN: his love
I LOSE: when heartbroken
I CONFUSE: guys that dont understand that im young and in love
I NEED: him...
I SHOULD: hang out with my bestfriend
x. father thinks i am: stupid for being with him
x. my boyfriend/girlfriend thinks I am: his only one :)
x. three things you are often complimented for: being friendly, singing
x. you get embarrassed when: someone makes me feel stupid or not good enough
x. makes you happy: Amanda, James and knowing hell come home, and just living
x. upsets you: have to wait
yes or no...
x. you keep a diary: a journal to him...lame?
x. you like to cook: i guess...
x. you have a secret you have not shared with anyone: yes......
x. you're in love: beyond..
x. you set your watch a few minutes ahead: no, i love being exact...im with manda, even though im usually late anyways
x. you bite your fingernails: unfortunately
x. you believe in love: yes **sigh**
Who is...?
the prettiest male you know: James...inside and out.
The weirdest person you know: well...swainy? but in a GOOD way lol
the Loudest Person you Know: Me definately lol..good one manda
the Sexiest Person you Know: id have to say kyle welter lol...fun stuff
Your close friends: Amanda...James...Lloyd...Yawny
the Person that Knows the Most about you: James...<3<3<3
Most Boring Teacher: Mr. Desantis...werd
What is...?
your most overused phrase on IM: ya or lol
the last image/thought you go to sleep with: laying next to him again..
your best feature: probably my eyes or my butt. seriously
Inside joke: i have tons...
Do You...?
take a shower everyday: yaya
have a(any) crush(es): is being in love a crush?
you've been in love: ive obviously answered that one about a million times
have any tattoos/where?: Hush Hush
piercings/where?: ears...first and seconds and cartlidge
get motion sickness: No
think you're a health freak: sometimes...i like to be clean and fit
get along with your parents: yes...even though my dad is a butt sometimes come to my boyfriend.......
like thunderstorms: YES!
WHEN YOU SEE THIS NAME YOU THINK Of
Ryan: Devlin
Rob: GAY rob
Drew: sexy lesbian...what??? lol
Heather: Sister.
Aaron: Carter?
Amy: Travis
Will: smith
Paul: Walker
Eve: ADAM
John: JON JON
Laura: Abate
Alex: Madagascar lol
Justin: ex.
Ricky: Martin
Jacob: no clue
Jack: meoff. haha good one Manda
( PREFERENCES )
CUDDLE OR MAKE OUT? either or? i do like to cuddle and talk...but making out isnt bad with a certain someone
CHOCOLATE MILK, OR HOT CHOCOLATE? yuck
MILK, DARK, OR WHITE CHOCOLATE? just milk please.
VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE? umm...
( MISC. QUESTIONS )
DO YOU LIKE TO TALK ON THE PHONE? sometimes...when i have free minutes or get to talk to the loverly
DO YOU LIKE TO DANCE? under the covers? i mean...lol...HELLS YA
WHAT ARE YOUR INITIALS? MNW
( IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU.... )
CRIED? yes......
HELPED SOMEONE? i believe
BOUGHT SOMETHING? um...yes?
GOTTEN SICK? felt sick
GONE TO THE MOVIES? nope
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? no
SAID "I LOVE YOU"? <3 yes
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? yes...to James.
TALKED TO AN EX? um? Yes...actually...Curtis Hooks. :)
MISSED AN EX? nope.
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? yes here and regular journal
TALKED TO SOMEONE YOU CRUSH ON? no...besides my baby
HAD A SERIOUS TALK? yes...made me cry
MISSED SOMEONE? Yes....i miss someone every second of every day
HUGGED SOMEONE? no
FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARENTS? no
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? nope
( DO YOU.... )
WEAR EYE SHADOW? every blue moon
WHAT COLOR IS YOUR FLOOR/CARPET IN YOUR ROOM? purpleish pink
HOW DID YOU SPEND LAST SUMMER? being depressed with amanda, and puking every now and then from nerves being shot...missing him...yet again. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 29th, 2005|04:41 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  nauseated | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Travelin Soldier | ] |
dont drink guys....its sucks and its bad for you.
ya...last night...EWW |
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| I cried.... |
[May. 27th, 2005|10:28 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | scared... | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Travelin' Soldier | ] |
Two days past eighteen
He was waiting for the bus in his army green
Sat down in a booth in a cafe there
Gave his order to a girl with a bow in her hair
He's a little shy so she gives him a smile
And he said would you mind sittin' down for a while
And talking to me,
I'm feeling a little low
She said I'm off in an hour and I know where we can go
So they went down and they sat on the pier
He said I bet you got a boyfriend but I don't care
I got no one to send a letter to
Would you mind if I sent one back here to you
Chorus: I cried
Never gonna hold the hand of another guy
Too young for him they told her
Waitin' for the love of a travelin' soldier
Our love will never end
Waitin' for the soldier to come back again
Never more to be alone when the letter said
A soldier's coming home
So the letters came from an army camp
In California then Vietnam
And he told her of his heart
It might be love and all of the things he was so scared of
He said when it's getting kinda rough over here
I think of that day sittin' down at the pier
And I close my eyes and see your pretty smile
Don't worry but I won't be able to write for awhile
[Chorus]
One Friday night at a football game
The Lord's Prayer said and the Anthem sang
A man said folks would you bow your heads
For a list of local Vietnam dead
Crying all alone under the stands
Was a piccolo player in the marching band
And one name read and nobody really cared
But a pretty little girl with a bow in her hair
[Chorus]
[Chorus] |
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| Please read this.....its sad. |
[May. 27th, 2005|01:39 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | wowed | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | loves the only house | ] |
Her hair was up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow. Today was "Daddy's Day" at school, and she couldn't wait to go. But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home. Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone. But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say. What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today. But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home. But the little girl went to school eager to tell them all. Of a dad whos never there a dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back, for everyone to meet. Children squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats. one by one the teacher called a student from the class. To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed. At last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare. each of them was searching, for a man who wasn't there. "Where's her daddy at?!" she heard a boy call out. "She probably doesn't have one," another student dared to shout. And from somewhere near the back, She heard another father say, "Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day." The words did not offend her, as she smiled up at her Mom. and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on. And with hands behind her back, Slowly she began to speak And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique. "My Daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be, Since this is such a special day And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know. All about my daddy and how much he loves me so. He loved to tell me stories he taught me to ride my bike. He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite. We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone. And though you cannot see him. I'm not standing here alone. "Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart I know because he told me, he'll forever be in my heart" With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears. Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years. And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd. She finished with a voice so soft, but its message clear and loud. "I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star. And if he could, he'd be here, but heaven's just too far You see he was a fireman and died just this past year When airplanes hit the towers and taught Americans to fear. But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away." And then she closed her eyes, and saw him there that day. And to her mother's amazement, she witnessed with surprise. A room full of daddies and children, all starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they saw before them, Who knows what they felt inside Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him at her side. "I know you're with me Daddy," to the silence she called out. And what happened next made believers, of those once filled with doubt. Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed.. But there on the desk beside her, was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose.
MY VIEWS:
this is SO sad...and it really made me cry alot. just think of how much people have given to our country...like their own lives. fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, daughters, sons, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts, grandparents even. all these people had families...and loved ones, and friends. they all had people to care for them..and had people they cared for...and yet they still went out there to help our country and ended up dieing in the process. we will not forget them. and even though i was not there...they still changed my life forever. made me believe.
somethings we never really understand and we take for granet...is our own lives...doesnt anyone understand that? have fun with your life yes...but also take the time each and everyday...to thank the people who died for you.
the American Flag: every stripe, every stitch in each star...represents you. us. our country. love eachother please...and take the time to do your thanking...
the colors stand for:
RED: the blood from those who have died.
WHITE: Purity and Unity
BLUE: Freedom!
dont take for granet what you have...and what was given to you. |
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| ...gone |
[May. 23rd, 2005|09:11 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | my baby...... | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Postal Service | ] |
so my baby left a few days ago...i have 4months without him. damn this sucks.
But worst of all, when he comes home from basic...he has anywhere from 24hrs to 6months until he leaves for Iraq! :'(
OMG...i am so scared.
anyone wanna give me some words of wisedom? and help me get through this SCARY ASS experience...
God. Please keep him safe through everything. <3 i love him so much.
he told me that when he gets back after that long scary year, he is going to take me to his special place and propose to me...OMG. YES!!! YES!!! NOW.....*tear*
i WILL be with him forever.
its going on a year and 7months guys...sigh* |
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| 21 days in counting. |
[Apr. 28th, 2005|10:01 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | Tear...again. | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Sniffs & Heartbeats | ] |
Ouch..thats all i can say...it hurts really bad to think about it. United States Airborne Ranger. Wow. Proud, yes. Scared, yes. Happy, yes. Upset, yes. I am gonna miss him so much its not even funny. I have learned so much from him and to live without him even for 4-5 months is gonna be so hard.
::God, please take care of him. Don't let anything happen to him whiles he's away, now, or later. NEVER! Please. I would give up anything for you to promise me that nothing will happen to him and he'll be safe. Even though I know you can't do that. He is so important to me and I won't do anything to make you want to take him away. PLEASE God! PLEASE.....
I am gonna pray that every single night until the day i die...with him, i hope.
::I want to spend the rest of my life with him, sharing stories, leaning on eachothers shoulders, helping eachother, loving eachother...please dont let him hurt me...or me hurt him for that matter. Let us love eachother and never let that die. I would give anything to know he'll be safe and be mine forever. <3
And thats my prayer for tonight...I love him.
My ARMY Goodnight.
goodnight my dear love
for it has been so long
without a letter sent from you
it's starting to feel wrong
with you fighting far away
for freedom and for me
im praying for that day to come
where home is where you'll be
but keep on fighting, make things right
then never leave me here
i want to hold you all life long
please come back my dear.
P.S. Please tell me he still LOVES me..? |
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| interesting. |
[Apr. 25th, 2005|09:39 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  actually quite fond | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Mirror | ] |
so today went ok i guess. i have been extremely "impaciente" lately. and being at rehearsal with a bunch of people who dont care didnt do me any good. but the first half of the day went quite well.
Next year: (ROTC)
~Company Commander
~Commander for Female Colorguard
~Commander of Female Armed Platoon
~HOPEFULLY Commander of Honorguard!
i just know that next year is gonna rock.
and something i just want to add:::
I love my baby no matter what happens to us. he's been there for me for so much as i was the same with him. this wed. will be a year and a half of us "technically" dating...well just put it as BEING TOGETHER! and no matter what has come our way...weve walked around it and kept on going. and even if tomorrow things change with his heart or mine (doubtful) but in case...i will NEVER stop loving him. he's my life! I love him! |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 24th, 2005|05:32 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | nauseated...seriously | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Across Five Aprils-A Year From Now | ] |
i feel so sick right now it's annoying. im just so annoyed with some shit i dont want to deal with it anymore. im feeling kinda Emo.
Horoscope of the day (explains it all):: You might take an important stand on some issue today. If so, you will surprise others--certainly some people. You're not afraid to speak up for what you believe in.
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| BREAKING NEWS!!! |
[Apr. 24th, 2005|02:58 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  WERD! | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Konstantine | ] |
Headline::: Kid scared and flies through wall into girl with flute and girl chokes to death from instrumental device. Cause-Girrrrrl...Results-Airbourne Peanuts!
AMANADA BENYO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH LIKE WHOA!
good times good times! |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 17th, 2005|02:04 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| |  hahaha...WANNA YA! | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Hawthorne Heights Baby! | ] |
i wanna get drunk and pass out. lol. i havent drank in a good while and it sounds like fun to me at the moment. dont know why, i have a sun burn, and a head ache...but ya...wanna get drunk? Yes!
::in the mood for::
{not together...yuck} |
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| i hate it. |
[Apr. 16th, 2005|09:46 pm] |
| [ | The Pulse |
| | yuck. | ] |
| [ | The Beat |
| | Spitalfield | ] |
i think im gonna puke...
-meagan wilfert- |
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